Cold Weather bringing out the Crazies

For the past couple weeks in school I have been teaching the kids all about Santa Claus, elves, reindeers, and Christmas carols. In Spain, the 3 wise men bring gifts to the kids on the 6^th of January, and then a big parade is held through the streets (anything for a parade, right?). A lot of them have heard of Santa, and were eager to answer my questions of where he lives (“el norte – que frio!”) and what he looks like (“fat man! fat man!”). Since the Spaniards celebrate the more religious aspects of the holiday instead of inventing a secular, jolly fat man to deliver their gifts, I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised by the giant nativity scene that arrived magically at our school one morning. This is honestly the largest scene I have ever seen. In the US, typically the nativity scene consists of the key members – people who you have actually heard of and have names, who were said to be present at the birth of Jesus. This scene, however, contains those key players, with about 100 of the local townspeople who I suppose just happened to show up for the big event. It is about 20 feet long, and includes scenery such as houses, grass, trees, and a river (yes, there is real water).

Upon first glance of this nativity scene, I began talking with the other American, Brett, about how bizarre it was to see a scene so large, and to see it in a public school. Another teacher soon joined our conversation, and became very confused as to what we were saying. Struggling with the correct Spanish translation of “secular” or “politically correct,” we told her that it simply wasn’t allowed in public places to show any sort of religious scenery. She was astounded, and could not understand why. When we explained that it is because not everyone was Christian, and people would get offended that their kids were being brainwashed by Christmas, she responded, well, at least the majority is Christian. Isn’t that enough to overrule the minorities? Honey… I’m sorry… but no. Our Spanish skills, however, were just struggling to explain this complicated nuisance of American society, so I’m sure she left the conversation extremely confused and most likely offended that we were knocking her traditions.

This was just the beginning of a bizarre day. During recreo, which is the 30 minute “breakfast” period at 11:45, one teacher ran into the staff room with both of her hands behind her back shouting “close the doors!” From behind her back she pulled two huge bottles of brandy, and starting pouring all of the teachers shots. When I said no thank you, as it was 11:45 in the morning, she responded “don’t be ridiculous, it’s cold outside”. Hmm, am I gonna get force-fed shots of nasty brandy every time the temperature drops below 60 degrees?

After this bizarre recreo, I walked into the hallway to see a boy being escorted down the hall by two teachers, screaming bloody murder. Next, I walked into my next class to find one of my favorite students, Enrique, icing his knee while sitting in a wheelchair. I asked another student, Angel, what happened, and didn’t quite catch his answer, except that something happened during recreo and he hurt his knee. The question that wasn’t answered, however, was where the heck the wheelchair came from. Does the school have a child-sized wheelchair lying around somewhere? And how did they get Enrique and his wheelchair upstairs without an elevator? Such questions are never answered when you’re talking with Spaniards. The teacher soon entered the classroom, along with two boys, Sanchez and Carlos, who were screaming at each other. Carlos kept yelling “I didn’t start it! Don’t listen to him!” while the always-misbehaving Sanchez just wore his usual sly smile. Is it something about the cold weather in Spain that brings out the crazies? Seems that way.

This class (fourth grade) is the very same class that my Chinese friend Luis, who incidentally is now, without explanation, addressed as Hitao, is in. The teacher first starting calling him Hitao at least four weeks after he had started at the school. Which makes me wonder, who started calling him Luis in the first place? Did they even ask him his name or did they just come up with the first Spanish one they could think of? And how did he finally get them to switch to Hitao? So many unanswered questions, that will most likely continue to go unanswered.